Impromptu Conversation

Today I learned that there is a right and wrong way to approach people. That sounds pretty straightforward and common sense, but it’s not. Backstory: I’m an introvert. If you haven’t read any of the numerous articles or books out recently about introverts, it basically means I get energy from having time by myself to recharge. I love being with people, but it takes a lot of energy for me to do that. Also, I like forming personal relationships with a few people instead of socializing in a large crowd. Having said this, I’ve always wanted to meet new people. I have a passion for ministry and part of that is getting to know people and their stories. The sad part is that I have a really hard time doing this. I really struggle with initializing contact with people. What are you supposed to do? Just walk up to someone, introduce yourself and ask about their life? 

Well, today that happened to us. I shouldn’t really say us, because it was 3 of my housemates that first met these girls. The girls they met were super nice, doing Saint Paul’s Outreach here in Kansas City, and we really hit it off. In the car on the way home though, Sarah said the way they introduced themselves was just terrible. She said my housemates were sitting on a bench outside waiting for Meghan and I to arrive, when Anna and Kimy (SPO girls) walked up and said “Hi. What’s your name?” My housemates were really turned off. They felt like these girls were intruding on their space or, because this was a slightly sketchy part of town, about to kidnap them or something. 

As they were talking about this I kept thinking, well what would have been a better way to do it? Would it have come off better if they said their names first and then asked for my housemates’ names? I doubt it. Should they have led with the information that they’re SPO volunteers and part of their mission is to meet young adults in the community? That makes it sound like they’re just meeting people to check something off  a list. Should they have started with comments about the froyo place my housemates were sitting outside of? Again, awkward and sort of creepy. 

So what’s the best way to do this? Is there a sure-fire way or are these encounters doomed to wade through awkwardness before potentially reaching the shores of true conversation and friendship? Comments and ideas welcome.